Confessions of the Chronically Frustrated

Since I've last posted we know all about my condition and what it entails.... Well... at least what I'll share. It's a painful, debilitating, unknown disease, and blah.. blah.. blah ... sound about right??-- Coolio!-- WELL, as a result of said "condition" I have been thinking (a   little  TOO  hard) and have further created more holes in my stomach. (remember: I have ulcers) ... THE POINT IS: I want a baby ! Yesterday. I do! I really REALLY do! I've always been fascinated w/ pregnancy and childbirth and babies in general! I love the lil suckers. I always thought as a kid I'd be a mom in my early 20's but I'm 22 now and... kinda... well... man-less. And thus, fruitless:-( *taps imaginary watch* Oh, can't you see?! Times'a wastin'!!!! Now you may be thinking, "Bish! What, pray tell, does ur disorder (or lack there of) have to w/ you being lonely and barren?!"<------ THAT IS IT! That right there! ... What if I am in

The common misconception about me is that I am w/o feeling... or I'm just plain mean. I AM NEITHER!!! In fact... underneath the thick callus that has become my exterior... I'm actually quite sensitive. I am in physical pain every second of the day! There is no time for crying and feeling sorry for myself 24/7. Right now, I feel like I've been placed in a CONSTANT state of vulnerability . If I am so much as touched the wrong way or hit something a lil too hard, I BRUISE... or puke... depends on the day. *shrugs* Therefore, my emotional state is OFF LIMITS ! Being emotionally independent is literally ALL I have left. SO if you do, in fact, hurt my feelings or offend me, (neither of which is easy) I'm NOT gonna give you the satisfaction of knowing... DUH!!!! Also, if you only knew the amount of BULLSHIT I have to entertain on any given day, you wouldn't question why I'm so blunt or why my sense of humor is just a lil "off" at times. IT'