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Does that make me Crazy??

Heyy!!! Sorry to my very few dedicated readers for my recent MIA status... A lot has been wearing on my soul lately...


...But, I digress...


Anyhey, I back and crazier than ever before!!! It's no secret to those who know me that I march to the beat of my own very offbeat drum. I have a way of thinking that is far beyond my own understanding & it seems to only get more & more out of control  o_O *gulp* That alone is scaryyy... I often become victim to these lil phases I go thru that make NO SENSE at all!... Let us review some of the wacky things I've subjected my poor mother to, shall we??

  • The time I really really wanted to join the circus... as a clown of course... just to get my foot in the entertainment door.
  • For three months during my 19th or 20th year (can't remember which), I just had to get my certification in massage therapy. Here's why that was just the stupidest thing EVER... I don't even like to be touched let alone having to rub up on some stranger's "bacne". Aaannnddd I have a foot phobia!!!-- I've found that the most jacked up feet always wanna be rubbed. Bleckkkk! Worst idea ever!
  • Getting pregnant just to be medically insured for at least 9 months.... That was short lived. Like, I think this particular desire lasted a solid day.
  • Becoming a sugar baby b/c everyone has their price, right?-- Admittedly, NOT one of my most ethical goals, and neither was this...
  • ... Seriously considered stripping. Yes, STRIPPING! Here's how much sense that made: I'd come to own my 1st bikini when I was 20 years old and I STILL feel exposed & uncomfortable wearing it. And I have the upper body strength of a 5 month old therefore leaving me utterly useless on that pole.
  • Moving to NYC on my own and making it as a huge Broadway star. Couple things, I am petrified of the city (not just that city, cuz I've never been there, but all cities in general. Ppl's is crazy out them streets!) And I am soooOoo NOT a fan of musicals. I'm just not hip to the idea of ppl breaking into song & no one so much as bats an eyelash... It's just not realistic! It's SOOO not normal! Let me go grocery shopping and break out in song and dance all thru the frozen food section... I guarantee I'd be banned from the store & committed, I'm sure! 
  • Going natural w/ my hair. *rolls eyes* That lil phase def lasted 2.5 years too long!!!!! (Sry, Turtle Dove) *shrugs*
  • Wanting to be a vegetarian UNTIL I found that you're really limited to just veggies! WTF?!... That is just no way to live.
  • Somehow, I figured living the life of a con artist was my best bet... I think we can all thank Leverage for that... & youtube for teaching me the fine art of lock picking! ; )
  • My latest and greatest phase that is still in the making: Settling down w/ a nice dude and becoming a housewife... at least until the kids start school. Here's the gotcha w/ this one: I have yet to settle down w/ someone for a month let alone the rest of my life! I'm known to some as a "man-eater" "she-wolf" "heart-breaker" (*cough cough* bullshit but whatever...) I think that I could really see this illogical bucket list topper to the very end! All that's required is a king sized bed (cuz I do NOT get down w/ the snuggling) and separate bathrooms (cuz men are gross). And I def can pull it off.......... Prolly. O_O
It seems that w/ recent events my crazy has indeed reached an all time high. Like, one moment I could be joking, talking shit... u know the usual... and the next I'm an uber-sensy you can't say shit to w/o hurting my pethetic lil feelings!!! Ughhh!!! I'm losing it & these luncheon ass revelations of my destiny are only getting worse! I do admit I'm just a tad crazy... Just a tad.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mEfDSP4g_U

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